Cold hands
by kyunyo
Summary: But Heiji didn't pay attention to what Kudou was saying. He was staring more at the shakiness of the index finger that was jutting out at the broken glass window. -HeiCon-


Just seeing how this would work here. hm. Not like I'm overly fond of FF . D8;; I like LJ more, aha...;;;

-.

-.

When he came to Tokyo, it wasn't a surprise to be pulled into a murder investigation ten minutes after the east detective picked him up from the train station. While walking from the terminal, the two ran into the police and who wouldn't want to recruit two of the best minds at criminal activity? It was some kind of serial execution by sword, the details weren't very clear since they were in a rush- and apparently Kudou was in on it too. But nevertheless he agreed to follow the small elementary kid. Heiji decided to shut his mouth and wordlessly watch, knowing that Tokyo was Kudou's forte and not his.

He was a visitor here, he might as well enjoy the deduction show.

Watching Kudou dart around to study evidence and whisper various reasoning while he breaks codes was fascinating. Heiji hadn't seen Kudou a lot in his real form, but what he could see in Conan, he imagined Kudou to be as well. Very poised and controlled- and he wondered if Kudou was just that unfazed to all this murder, considering his abnormal luck for running into them.

What he did find peculiar was how Kudou would sometimes pinch his pants and tug him along, pointing at noteworthy things. The act was never done in the past and in the present it seemed unnecessary, since Heiji always followed close behind, upper body leaning towards the ground, ears open.

When Conan's deductions resolved, his execution of the deduction show was different. He confidently put away his bowtie and tranquilizer watch with full faith that Heiji had been listening.

He had. When they confronted the criminal, Heiji didn't think twice to wonder why he found himself staring back at a glare of a sharp blade. He grabbed a nearby iron pipe and in a battle of kendo skills against the murderer's swordsmanship, Heiji managed to stun him with a hit from his makeshift shinai.

By the time the police arrived to the scene, it was already night time and a chill settled in the city. In the midst of flashing blue and red lights, a middle-aged police officer walked up to them, or more so the little kid, and placed a small piece of chocolate into his hand.

"Great job, little detective," he congratulated, with a knowing smile and twinkle in his eyes. Conan expressed his thanks in the way that all little kids should. Heiji stubbornly chewed on his lower lip. It was weird that Kudou was given the due credit and not him, but after thinking for a while about how he didn't really know where the case was going, he gave up mulling over his unstroked ego.

"What body will we find tomorrow?" Heiji jokingly asked aloud as the two mutually agreed to hunt for a restaurant to eat in. He looked down to see Kudou grasping and ungrasping his hands. Whether he replied or not, Heiji wasn't sure because he heard the same policeman yell them a farewell.

"Be sure to hold his hand when he crosses the street!" The policeman yelled after them with good cheer, and he wouldn't stop reminding him until Heiji clutched Conan's tiny hand.

The boy didn't seem to mind. Even if he was seventeen years old in mind and holding hands with another boy no less, Conan didn't mind the contact. Heiji pulled down his cap as they stopped at an intersection stop light.

"Cold, isn't it?"

"Yeah."

Though he wasn't commenting on the weather, but rather Conan's hand. After they crossed the road, Heiji suggested that Conan take him to one of Tokyo's famous ramen stops, to "warm up" he cheerily smirked.

Conan agreed, but his hands were still cold.

-.

-.

Heiji woke up to small hands clutching at his tank top. He woke up not because the stupid shining sun was peeking through the curtains trying to blind him but because something cold- cold, _cold _was touching his shoulder.

What was he doing-? Right, sleeping over at Mouri's place since Mouri and Ran had gone on a family trip with the mom.

He sat up and whatever cold thing that was on him fell down softly with a thump. He had borrowed the old man's bed since Kudou insisted that the guest should be sleeping comfortable and that Kudou was fine sleeping on the floor since he had always slept on the floor when Mouri was around. When Heiji glanced down, he saw Conan curled up next to him on the side, with an occasional shiver climbing up his shoulders.

Well, apparently with the way Kudou snuck under his sheets, Heiji doubted his insistence. Another twitch of Conan's shoulder and Heiji rose an eyebrow.

Was he having a bad dream or just having muscle spasms?

Heiji decided to find out by poking his baby-soft cheeks. After a few pokes, the shrunken detective still didn't awake; instead small cold fingers wrapped around his long index and pulled it close.

And Heiji watched the boy nuzzle closer to warmth of his side; the Osakan sighed before turning to heap more blankets and covers on top of him.

-.

-.

Today, they were supposed to go to the newly built Tokyo observatory tower. Heiji was mildly excited as was Conan and they bickered on, jokingly arguing about which view, Tokyo or Osaka, was superior. On their way there, a man fell from a department store building and nearly landed on Conan had not Heiji notice a strange falling shadow and pulled him away quickly.

Blood splattered and he swore he heard Conan sigh, yet again.

Megure came with his army of forensics and policemen, intrigued that they had bumped into the detective duo yet again. They didn't help much since he and Kudou were already on their knees looking for the glass remains.

When they were gently patting the floor, Heiji noticed the slight tremor in Kudou's hands. Come to think of it, there was always a small shiver whenever Conan pinched the fabric of his pants.

"Oi, are you alright?" He grasped the tiny child-like hands before it could move elsewhere on the concrete. When he looked dead straight into Kudou's eyes, Conan stared back with incredulity and confusion.

"I _am _alright," he fired back, eyes glinting, eyebrows raising. Heiji grunted a doubtful hum in reply, releasing his abnormally cold hands. If he said he was fine, then he was... alright?

But as he sat up on his heels and watched Kudou investigate further, he noticed the faintest twitch on his shoulders and the occasional rub of his bare arms.

The same policeman from the day before was there. He gave the kid another small piece of chocolate before he escorted Conan by the shoulders away from the dead body. He shooed him gently elsewhere with the excuse that he should buy the latest Kamen Yaiba figure in the store. Perhaps Kudou was just staring a bit too long at the dead body and the older policeman had a parental concern for the boy's well-being, Heiji wasn't really sure.

After a bit of Kudou's well practiced childish whining, he obtained the evidence he needed from another policeman. The middle-aged man wandered over to Heiji and bumped him softly with an elbow.

"You know that kid-?"

But it wasn't really a question.

"Him?" And his eyes already pointed at Conan, who dug through the evidence with over-sized gloves on. The policeman gave him a firm pat on the shoulder.

"I think he needs to wear a jacket next time, he's shivering, even in this weather."

Even in this weather, the policeman says, before he left to report to Megure about something Conan found.

"Hattori, check this-" And another pinch of his pants pulled him towards the spot where Conan had studied. He released his grip and excitedly pointed at the ground.

"This is enough evidence to incriminate the criminal-"

But Heiji didn't pay attention to what Kudou was saying. He was staring more at the shakiness of the index finger that was jutting out at the broken glass window.

Maybe Kudou was not okay.

-.

-.

Heiji couldn't sleep. The events of the day kept replaying in his head: a body, a culprit, a sigh, and a steady shiver. Although they both successfully managed to pinpoint the exact murderer and get her to confess her motive, there was a bigger mystery at hand- or Heiji deemed it as one.

It wasn't so much a mystery he was itching to solve, but it was like a small puzzle or code that he couldn't figure out, and didn't need to figure out.

But it bothered him.

Kudou never seemed cold the last time he visited- then again, the last time he visited was almost half a year ago. The absence of another detective was suffocating, which was why he insisted to stay over during Conan's spring break and keep him company since the sister and old man decided to go on a family vacation. Half a year was enough to change a person, but Heiji wasn't surprised to see him as short as he ever was. Kudou, after two years, still remained in his child like body. And in two years, he's seen far more bodies than normal nine year olds would have saw- hell, he's seen more bodies than Heiji has in Osaka-

He nearly jumped when something cold made home in the crook of his elbow. He turned his head slightly, the pillow underneath his hair crinkled quietly.

From the dim light, Kudou looked like he slept peacefully. But a few more seconds of intently watching his shoulder, it seemed like he was having a nightmare. He placed a hand onto the shaking shoulder and it calmed considerably-

Whatever was happening to his friend was making Heiji worry. Was Kudou ever like this? He wasn't sure. To him, Kudou seemed confident and assured of himself. So why is it that his hand would shake when he confidently declared that person to be the culprit, or grip Heiji's pant leg when he finds some kind of evidence?

All these questions were making him frustrated; and the more he thought about it, the more he felt guilty for not checking up on Kudou every once in a while.

"Oi," he muttered as he reeled him into an embrace. The occasional shivers died and the stiff shoulders relaxed once he enclosed his arms around them. The Osakan turned onto his back, pulling Conan closer to his side.

"I'm your best friend, yeah? So why don't I know what's goin' on?"

-.

-.

Kudou was taken hostage in a small store and for the first time in a long time, Heiji was scared for his life.

Today, Kudou was planning on taking him to Tropical Land, showing him the place where there was a murder involving piano wire, and ultimately showing him the exact grass area where he was poisoned.

There seemed to be no motive other than the intent of showing Heiji around the place- except, who in their right minds would show him the place where all misfortune started? But Kudou was alright, even said with a very proud smirk that he was able to deduce the piano-wire murderer and stop her from suicide.

While they were driving there on a rented moped, Kudou told Heiji to stop at a store- drinks were expensive at Tropical Land, so he'll get snacks while the Osakan waits outside.

And that was when it happened.

Conan didn't come out as he waited for more than ten minutes. His gut feeling told him something was wrong.

Always trust your gut feeling, Heiji had learned. So before running in, he dialed for the police.

Within minutes, it was confirmed that it was a hostage situation, and Japanese police surrounded the area, hesitant to barge in to take control of the two gunmen and their eight hostages.

Kudou was the worst person to be held at gun point since that would mean an immediate arrest on the criminal's part- at least that's what Heiji had thought before he heard a gun shot sound in the closed rooms behind the counter.

When the police forced the doors open after a vigorous struggle, they found the blind-folded hostages trembling, a little girl sobbing next to a dropped knife, both of the criminals writhing on the floor and Kudou, with his quick cold fingers, disassembling the gun, letting the parts drop on the floor.

Heiji was mildly impressed, even went to congratulate the shrunken detective, until the sight of his hands made him swallow his words.

There was the faintest stain of blood near the palms of his hands, unnoticeable except to someone who would actually look. And Heiji looked long enough to know that it was not just a blood splatter from a gunshot. What was it-?

Megure was going to interrogate Conan or congratulate him- but Heiji gave him a pleading look, silently imploring him to lay off. The inspector was surprised, but nevertheless acquiesced and turned his attention to the remaining hostages.

Heiji approached the lone boy- the police who rushed in to help the hostages didn't even look at him. They didn't need to. He was already considered part of the task force, he was already considered "okay", even when he was held hostage, even when-

"Kudou." Heiji started as he stopped a few feet from the shrunken detective. The small boy didn't budge, didn't even bat an eye. He stared straight at the gun in his hands. He would have disassembled it down to the screws had not his trembling fingers fail him. The Osakan watched wordlessly, eyes falling to the bullets on the floor.

There were two empty shells amongst the other loaded. And he wondered what pressure, locked in a room with seven hostages and two gunmen, Kudou was under. What forced his hand? And what happened?

"Hey," he dropped his voice into a whisper, bending over to peer at his listless eyes. "Kudou?"

His breath was coming out short and interrupted, gradually becoming louder as his tremors traveled from his hand to his shoulders. And Heiji felt a small sort of dread pool in his stomach, as Kudou opened his mouth and breathed out in a course whisper- "What did I-"

The gun clattered noisily to the ground- no one bothered to look- and Heiji saw the red on his hand clearer. A single blood streak was smeared on his palm. Bronze hands quickly fumbled to grasp his hand, green eyes flaring to study the skin. If it wasn't an injury, how did it get there? It was as broad as a-

Things fell quickly into place.

Heiji shifted his glance towards the neglected knife laying on the side- swiped clean but luminol testing could prove otherwise. It took two minutes since the gunshot for the door to be forced open. In two minutes-

Kudou could have done a lot in _just _two minutes.

"I... what..." His eyes were wide, brimming with confusion, borderline fear. The small detective finally realized the gravity of his situation and he was scared.

Locked in a room, two gunmen, six adults, one little child, Kudou. Things were demanded and only the two children were at gun point.

Kudou wasn't blindfolded.

He wasn't even tied.

After countless amounts of cases, dead bodies. and threats, he was bound to crack. It was envitable, Kudou was human. But to crack in a way that would have him voluntary sink a knife into the criminals' gunshot wound-

"Kudou, Kudou look at me."

He grabbed his hands, pulling it away from Conan's gaze. With the corner of his dark jacket, he made work to rub away the blood. Heiji looked back up to see Conan staring right back. He swallowed thickly, taken aback by the sense of hopelessness in his eyes and he allowed dread to sink his heart.

Sharp breath and then a release-

"Hattori-"

His fingertips trembled and for a while, Heiji clamped his hand around his. Still cold, why is he so cold-

"I didn't," Kudou choked at first before biting his lower lip harshly. And dammit his hands weren't getting any warmer.

In a loud growl, Heiji pulled him into a tight embrace, arms wrapping around to hold the nine year old's quivering shoulders. "It was self-defense, Kudou," he whispered in his ear. "You tried to grab the knife away from 'im, an' he cut your hand."

He paused and held him closer; he could feel the boy's ragged breathing through his jacket. "They threatened to shoot anyone who moved. One of them let their guard down, an' so you grabbed the gun, which smeared the blood on your hand, an' shot them because they would've hurt the little girl-"

The tuft of hair buried into his shirt, and he shook his head- "No, I-"

"They would've hurt the others. They would've hurt you if you didn' shoot." He pulled back and stared hard at Conan. He gave a fake yet cheery smile. "You're okay, you're alright."

And when Kudou returned the comforting hug and fell limp with the occasional twitch of his shoulder, Heiji wondered that if he too would be affected so much like him that his flesh would be cold as if he walked among the dead.

"Hattori-kun, is Conan-kun-" Megure had stepped into the room, finally realizing that there was one more hostage they had yet to interrogate.

"He's tired," Heiji replied with a soft sigh. With ease he picked up the boy and held him to his chest. Small and icy hands pressed against him. "Even after he's seen all these bodies and stuff, a lil' kiddo can't take that much, neh?"

"But Hattori-kun, he shot a gun-" the middle-aged inspector argued but futilely as he heard some of the police officers murmur protest.

"An' it was self defense, ask the girl, why don'tcha?" He gave Megure a polite smile, eyes twitching in irritation. "I think ya can charge them two for holdin' eight hostages without Conan's word; give the kid a break already, let me take 'im home. Get him some food or somethin'. He'll be alright after this."

Megure wordlessly flapped his mouth, open and then closed before he scratched his head. "Well, alright then, Hattori-kun. Please take care of him."

And when he walked out finally from the suffocating room, and out of the store, he saw the same middle-aged father of a policeman standing alone near the caution tape. "How is he?" he asked quietly as Heiji approached.

He threw a tired glance over the bundle of clothes- he decided to cover him with his jacket- and shrugged listlessly.

"He's okay, he'll be alright." Was the simple explanation he gave.

And when Heiji walked back to the empty Mouri agency, saw the scattered case files on the table, lay the boy down onto Mouri's bed, and tucked him in under various of blankets, Heiji thought that maybe the best vacation for Kudou was for him to stay home.

-.

-.

Interesting. It sure has interesting formatting... o-o

Anyways as I stated, I'm not really fond of FF , so if you wanna see more DC fics, check out yoyotea at livejournal. C:


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